The answer always is... Texas Caviar

What do I bring to a potluck?

What can I eat with tortilla chips?

What can I pack for lunch?

How can I increase my fiber intake?

.... Texas Caviar (or otherwise known as Cowboy Caviar)

I tried this recipe from Cook's Country on a whim a few years ago for an afternoon at a picnic with some friends. I had no idea how it would turn out, and I was a little nervous about bringing basically a pickled bean and pepper salad.

Oh my goodness, this recipe is GOOD. Us 6 adults easily polished this recipe off in an hour. I bring it to work with my multi-grain chips, I bring it to church activities, and I recommend it all.the.time as a dip and side dish. You can always adjust the spiciness with the jalapeno. Anyways, I highly recommend this bean dip!

Source: cookscountry.com

Texas Caviar

Ingredients
1/3cup red wine vinegar
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 tablespoon sugar
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 tsp Salt and 1/4 tsp pepper
2 (15.5-ounce) cans black-eyed peas, rinsed
6 scallions, sliced thin
1 red bell pepper, stemmed, seeded, and chopped
1 green bell pepper, stemmed, seeded, and chopped
2 jalapeño chiles, stemmed, seeded, and minced
1 celery rib, chopped fine
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley

Instructions:
1) Whisk vinegar, oil, sugar, salt, and pepper together.
2) Mix wet ingredients into dry ingredients.
3) Let flavors meld for at least an hour before serving (in refrigerator). Serve cold or at room temperature.

Life-Changing Revelation

When we were getting ready for bed last night, I told Graham that I had a life-changing revelation today. His first response was, "is this serious, or are you joking about makeup or something ridiculous?"

Ok, so I do joke a lot about important and stupid things... which is kind of what this blog is about.

Maybe you already know this, but it took me 36 years of my life to realize this.. Guys don't like funny girls/women.

Why was this such a shocker for me?? Even as a woman, I personally don't like a lot of female comediennes, but this is different. I like guys with a good sense of humor. I always have. I'm not unique in this trait, but I always assumed that because I found a funny guy attractive, that a guy would also be attracted to me because I am funny.

My journal entries throughout high school and college are filled with the mystified thoughts of why guys didn't like me because I was: 1) smart, 2) funny, and 3) cute. I thought these traits should make me irresistible, right? Some of my journal entries from high school and college are written below:

“I just don’t understand why I am a friend girl to everyone! I thought guys liked funny girls.. 
I thought being myself would help also. However—nothing seems to work!"

 "I just thought guys liked funny girls… 
From my track record, that would be a loud, resounding NO.”

I came to the conclusion in my 20's after I was married that most teenage boys and college guys absolutely do not give an F about #1 and #2. Some might, but most are concerned about looks.

And finally in my 30's, I have realized that most boys/guys/men do not want a woman who is funny in her own right.. and this is backed by science. There are many psychological studies that demonstrate that women find humor attractive in a male, but this is not reciprocated by men. Men find a sense of humor attractive, but it falls under the category of "humor appreciation". This means women who laugh at men's jokes are found to be more attractive. Men find some funny women (especially those with a male or aggressive sense of humor) to be a challenge or a threat, whether it's to their ego or whatever.

#notallmen

The same study states, however, that some men find funny women attractive. These men are usually older, more educated, and have higher self-esteem. Maybe you're a guy and you're reading this, and you're offended by this because you like funny women.. Good for you. More power to you. I like you already.

Also, I wanted to clarify that the study does specify that while men may enjoy jokes from women, they "rarely want to marry them". That's a sad generalization.

As I've gotten older, I've also realized that the kind of humor I employ has an effect on others. I love self-deprecating humor. I make fun of myself a lot, and sometimes I assume others do too... Poor assumption, I know.

Case in point... I was at a young single adult church activity with some friends and some people I had never met before. A guy I had never met was calling a girl to ask her a question about something. She didn't answer, and the guy said, "oh, she missed my call", to which I teasingly responded, "Oh, she's probably just avoiding your call". He gave me a look of death and asked rudely, "Do I know you?" I should have known that joke wouldn't be funny to him--he was a law student. He was much too serious to laugh at himself.

Another example... I was at another church activity. It was field day races, and a cute guy was on my team. We were doing potato sack races, and when our team won, I flirtatiously remarked, "Oh, you must be good in the sack." He laughed nervously, and then never talked to me after that night. Turns out that some Mormon guys are uncomfortable with sexual humor. Awk-ward.

I also learned that sarcasm can be a little funny, but is not really desirable in a long-term relationship. In high school and college, I was probably wayyyy too sarcastic and mean. I had some self-esteem issues that made me insecure (still do actually), and sarcasm was my deflection technique. I dated some sarcastic guys in college, and while they made me laugh, it really wouldn't have worked out. Eventually sarcasm can be mean and degrading from a romantic partner.

Thankfully, I met Graham. While he admits that he was a bit intimidated by me (I am older, funny, and smart), he has enjoyed my humor since we met. To me, Graham has the perfect mix of all my favorite kind of senses of humor: goofy, self-deprecating, and some sexual. He made me less sarcastic and less mean. Is that what love does to humor? Is your sense of humor dependent on your mood and your relationship?

Anyways, I still love to joke with men.. just to mess with them a little bit. I love some good clever and witty banter. But the last thing I'm now wondering about me is if this is considered to be flirting...? I'm going to chew on that for a bit.

I'm willing to say that most of it is based on the situation I'm in. I do joke with my patients at work to make them feel comfortable, but I don't joke flirtatiously (although I'm fairly certain some of my male patients have taken it that way). As far as my interpersonal relationships with men and other friends, I try to be really careful with how I joke because sometimes I take it too far (just ask Graham's family).

When it comes to my sense of humor.. I'm going to leave this journal entry from 2003 to describe how I feel...

“If I wasn’t myself, I don’t know how I’d live. 

If I didn’t find humor in everything, life would seem so bleak.”

I'm too embarrassed to post any photos of me doing totally weird stuff to be funny (I have lots of those), but here's a good example of how me and my roommates tried to be funny and creative in college. 

Ode to My Little Sade Babe

Sadie...

You are exactly what I wanted in a daughter.

You are my tiny little capricious sprite that I adore.

You are semi-sweet, hilarious, mischievous, and a snuggle-bunny.

"Can you snuggle me for a lil bit?" is your favorite saying right now.

Your little dimples make it hard for us to say no.

But your tenacious streak is extremely irritating (once you asked us for dessert for about 30 minutes straight).

You love to eat all fruits. You can pound down a pint of blueberries in 10 minutes.

You love to color, sing, and play with dolls and blocks.

You play pretend and you even get your dad to dance with you (he's only ever danced with me twice).

You tease your brother and will copy anything that he says or does. You wish his room were your room as well.

You love all things pink with unicorns and princesses.

You are definitely a girly girl and love to get your nails painted.

I'm worried about the day that you will be able to reach my makeup counter.

Your feisty spirit and determined nature will take you far in this life.

You have been the last and most adorable addition to our family. We love you dearly. 

Dear College Sherri..

So I recently met up with a friend that I had my freshman year of college at BYU. We really haven't seen each other since 2004-2006 (maybe even 2002??) other than Facebook. Both of us now live in the same town after not having seen each other in probably 14+ years.. It is pretty random that we now live in the same town, but that's beside the point..

←←My first day at BYU. Check out the sparkly lilac eyeshadow.



Man oh man was I nervous.. and it really got me thinking.. What was I like at 18/19 years old? What kind of impression did I leave? Am I even the same person that I was then?

Examples of me during my early college years..

Always trying to shake it like Shakira.

I want to clarify that this photo is a satire of Utah fashion. 

I'm not quite sure why we did this with our hands.

Please take note of the hair and choker. So 1990's, yet this was 2002..

You're welcome. The 2000's decade was not good for me fashion-wise (missing is the photo of me in a Juicy Couture velour track suit).

If I went back in time, would I tell myself anything? Would I do something differently? How have I changed?

Well, for starters..

I am essentially the same person half my life later (yes I was 18--18 years ago!).. I am still an introvert, self-conscious, slightly competitive, witty (I've always considered myself to be funny even if you don't), full of social anxiety, even-tempered mood (apparently the formal term is equanimous), kind of lazy, and an overall logical/pragmatic person.

However, I do care less about what people think of me despite being self-conscious. I am more responsible, less judgmental, more empathetic, less attention-seeking, more spiritual, and less sarcastic.

I have been through a lot within the past two decades that has helped me mature. Would I go back and change some things? Absolutely--there are some things I have said and done that make me cringe so hard. But, the experiences that were difficult to get through are what made me who I am today. Hey, I straight-up told a guy friend that I had a crush on him, and he told me he didn't. That was the worst thing ever to 19 year-old me. I made myself vulnerable and really put myself out there, and I was devastated when I was rejected. But the experience taught me that 1) "he's just not that into you if he's not asking you out", and 2) it's ok to be vulnerable sometimes. I also learned that I don't like when a guy serenades me with a guitar. That was a really difficult experience to live through, and it was only 5 minutes of my time in college.

If there is one thing I wish I could tell my late teens, early 20's self is that I will not get married in college. I wasted soooo much time worrying about boys and not about college! My outlook in life during those years would've been much different if I worried about my grades and not my dating life.

Anyways, what if you met someone from your past that you haven't seen in years? Would you revert back to your old self, or do you feel comfortable enough in your own skin as you are today?



Spoiler alert: the blast from the past meet-up went well and wasn't awkward.

New Old Exercise Routine

Look.. I did a comparison photo shoot. Like I said, not too much difference in 2019 from 2018. Boo.

                                              2017                      2018                    2019

But, I got this cool scale from Renpho (only $25 on Amazon) that tracks my % body fat, weight loss, etc, and syncs to my FitBit account. It's pretty good and wayyy cheaper than the FitBit scale. The surprising thing when I stepped on the scale was that I don't have a high % of body fat. Visceral fat, on the other hand, (the fat around my organs--yes, that's not good) was a little higher than I'd like. When I got my DEXA scan (the gold standard for measuring fat/muslce/bone mass) in grad school when I was 25 years old, my body fat % was much higher (I was not exercising then, but weighed approximately 10# less). Here's my report..

Body Fat %

Subcutaneous fat %

 Visceral Fat

It shows you normal ranges of each individual category including bone mass, and it also tracks your changes. Another cool thing is that you can set up multiple users in your Renpho smartphone app. The hilarious thing is if you don't change the user on your app before you weigh someone, it can track changes incorrectly. Carter stepped on the scale and didn't tell me before he did, so I got a "CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE LOST 100 POUNDS!" notification from my phone. Um yeah, if I weighed 45 lbs I would be dead.

Like I said before, I recently changed from all cardio to online RIPPED workouts. I used to do the workouts at the local YMCA, but now I live ~30+ minutes away from the closest class.



I am going to sing its praises to the world. If you are like me and can't help exercising to a beat, or if you really like to go with a choreographed routine, this is the workout for you. I cannot stand lifting weights because it is sooooo boring and I can't do it to a beat. RIPPED makes lifting weights, push-ups, and cardio so much fun because it goes with the music. The 60-minutes literally fly by (although they have shorter routines as well). I feel my muscles getting stronger, and I'm getting more agile with all of the plyometrics in the routines. I just love this workout so much that I wanted to share it with you all. I wish they would have a free temporary trial for everybody just to see if you would like it, but c'est la vie.

The online subscription is $10/month, which is pretty good. I hope they add more videos, or that they had some options to pay for digital downloads or DVD's. Anyways, just wanted to share this with you all.