Unfortunately, it's not any of those things. Life is hard. Marriage is tough. Raising kids isn't always fun. Building a home (as you all know now) is not a walk in the park.
I can say that Graham is my best friend. There is nobody else that I'd rather be with. He makes me laugh, he frustrates me, he calms me, and he has literally made me crazy at times. Our marriage isn't perfect, but it's been full of laughter and tears.
I wish I could share more about what's going on in our private lives, but I can't. It's not the right time. When we went through hard times ~5 years ago, I was pretty open about our experiences. Now, I'm a bit more hesitant to share.. especially considering how much more jaded I've become. I've been pretty sad--actually sad doesn't even scratch the surface of what I've been feeling--and I've had a few friends help lift me up. It's sad when you realize how little support you have left outside of your marriage. It can be kind of isolating at times. I've been on this crazy roller coaster, feeling like my life was spiraling out of control... with nobody to confide in.. mostly because I don't want anyone to judge me or Graham.
Anyways, I'll share our story sometime, somehow, in some way.
Right now, we are continuing on in holy matrimony.. bound together by our commitments to each other, to God, our family, and this gosh-dang house. We are committed to making this work, for better or for worse.
Maybe next time I'll share some of my favorite moments over the past 10 years..
Until then, I leave you with one wedding photo.
1 comment:
Old fogies! Me too. Life goes by so stinking fast, yet slow...it’s odd. Sometimes I wish I was a child still to not know the harsh realities of life. Then I see others who have walked paths of bitter pain and they have peace and are wonderful people. As I get older and experience more I understand more why some people are so grumpy. It truly is a gift to offer the world around you joy and sunshine. Still working on that. It seems to get harder and harder. I feel increasingly grumpy and less like sunshine. It’s disappointing. It must all just point to the fact that it takes dedicated and focused work. I take comfort in remembering the Savior and that I can’t do it all alone because that’s not possible for anyone. Now, how to be truly “equally yoked”...the quest of a lifetime. These last months have taught me that service, even the very small things, brings a special peace to my heart that I need and don’t have otherwise. Of course, all of our challenges are different, yet we are all on this quest for peace, strength, joy, fulfillment. I’m glad we met...what, 17 years ago (!!!!!) and so glad you live close. I love you guys and am grateful to count you as my friends. End of rambling novel.
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