This is the home building post I DIDN'T want to write..

If you know me beyond this blog, you know I don't put people on blast normally. I *usually* don't enjoy fighting with people online, and I try not to post a lot of negativity on my social media. I don't really do negative reviews on Yelp, either, although I do understand the necessity of truth telling from people. However, I think negativity tends to be more contagious than positivity, and when all you can think about is the bad stuff, you forget all of the good stuff.

With that being said, Graham and I are not happy with our builder. Remember why we said we signed a contract with Lexar of Tacoma back in November? Because the base price of the home was going to increase by $25-30K over the next few months! So, we rushed into it before we were truly ready. We were planning to wait for two years after buying the land to save up more money, but then the price of the home was so low it was smarter to just go for it.

So, we've had a pretty good experience so far with our Lexar office. They've been busy, but have communicated well about their delays. They have been forthcoming about some of the issues they have been having with their builds due to labor and supply shortages. We were thrilled to be SO CLOSE to pouring our foundation (I mean like literally, it could be a week away at the most).

And then, I got an email asking for my phone number so the construction manager could call me. Hmmm, not a good sign. We had a brief conversation that the corporate office was making them increase the base price of the home. We were told the increase of the price was based on how long ago we signed the contract and how close we were to pouring the foundation. When I asked how much so I could be mentally prepared, I was told the info would be in the email later that day. So, no help there. Graham and I were upset, but then we got the email that night around 9 PM, that the cost of the home would go up by $24,000. We could pay out of pocket (yeah sure), or get a letter from our lender for the extra funds (not happening either).

Graham and I could NOT sleep that night. I mean, here we are, $40K down already, we just closed on our loan a few weeks prior, and we have a giant hole in the ground.. and now they're asking for more money! They justified this huge increase in cost by the clause in their contract that if your foundation is not poured within 60 days of signing the contract, they can increase the price. We were initially very concerned about the language in the contract, but we were assured by the salesman that they would not increase the cost. Apparently, this same clause is used by other "on your lot" builders as well, so Lexar isn't the only one who can screw you over. I mean seriously, 60 days to get your foundation poured from signing the contract? That's freaking impossible. We didn't get our finished plans until four months past the signing date, so only then could we get our site plans, construction loan, and permits. Everything literally couldn't come together until July.. EIGHT months after we signed the contract.

They told us that 14 other families are in the same position as us.. which was reassuring, but not really.. because we know the pain and anger that they were feeling. Graham had a long talk with the salesman the next day, calling him a liar and a bad person for telling us months ago that they wouldn't increase their prices. I thought that was a bit extreme and mean.. until I heard what the other families said to them. Many people threatened to take their business elsewhere, somebody threatened to burn their office down, and somebody else brought up bringing their gun into their office to shoot them (which isn't so funny nowadays). So, I think their reactions were a bit more extreme than Graham's, and I didn't feel as bad.

So, over the next few days, we weighed our options: taking our business elsewhere, changing our house plan, and/or getting rid of some of our additions. We were hoping that the corporate office would be willing to take a hit off their profits and just increase our price by $10K, but no such luck. However, the construction manager and salesmen worked hard to present a couple of changes to our plans. We do have to give them some credit because they aren't the owners of this location/franchise, and this mandate came from the top down.. and they're the ones who had to deal with the hate and backlash from their customers. They proposed some things to save $12K like: changing the pitch of the roof, changing some of the cabinets and trim, getting rid of some of the smart home features, and replacing the original recessed lights with dome lights (not ok with that one--I hate boob-shaped lights hanging down from the ceiling). We accepted most of the changes, but we had some ideas of our own..

--We are getting rid of the wood-burning stove and the stone behind it. That's $7K.
--We can get rid of some of the recessed lights we added to the plan.
--In extreme measures, we can get rid of the tiled master shower and the full height tile backsplash in the master bathroom, but we really don't want to..

Anyways, we meet with them tomorrow to discuss some of the changes and issues. We will owe them money, but we hope not more than $5K. Like I said before, this SUCKS, but the cost-changing issue is not only limited to Lexar.. so for those of you who are considering building your own home with one of these "on your lot" builders, beware! And, we all have watched enough HGTV to know enough that any custom home will have budget and timeline issues. It's not solely limited to these builders or the Seattle area. We are grateful for the construction manager's and the salesmen's efforts to helping still build our dream, but it doesn't really make me happy to pay more out of pocket when I'm already stressing about the budget.

Lastly, Lexar, if you are reading this.. I don't fault you for trying to make a profit. I know you're not a non-profit organization and don't build houses for charity. But seriously, don't try to tell me that you're "not making a dime" off my house. You are raising my price to the current base price for my home.. so if that were true, you wouldn't be making a dime off any of the other houses that you are currently under contract to build. So, if you weren't in it just for the money, I would've expected a small increase on the base price of my home, or I would've expected to see a bigger across-the-board cost increases on your other customers' homes and your website as well. So seriously, don't try to placate me with that empty phrase. K thanks.

Update: Curious about our progress? Click on this link to see all of our home building updates, or check out my Instagram account.

Pregnancy Life

Well ladies and gentlemen,

I have not completely abandoned my blog here. I thought about it, sure, but I kind of want to keep this thing going 10+ years (just 6-7 more months to go until I hit my 10-year anniversary!). I also like to occasionally publicly journal my life, activities, and feelings, just to get them out there and make me feel better. I don't really keep a journal anymore..

Anyways, I just wanted to kind of get some things out that I've been thinking a lot about lately. Obviously, I've been pregnant for the past seven months... and it hasn't been easy. It's weird. We planned to try for our second child when Graham got back from Virginia, and BOOM, we were pregnant within the month. Almost too easy, right? I wasn't as crazy about taking home pregnancy tests as I was the first time around (I only took three tests this time, as opposed to like seven or more the first time), but it was like suspiciously easy. I'm not used to things going like I planned.

Then, Graham went through training for his job. To put it plainly, he works for the government and military, and had to do lots of on-site training. He had to work day shift, swing shift, and graveyard, for various weeks at a time. This sucked as I had planned on commuting with him daily. I'd drop him off, drop Carter off, and go to work, and then repeat on the way home. Plus, it meant I was alone in the mornings/evenings/nights, depending on the shift he was working. Then, he passed his qualification exam for work with flying colors (yay!) in November.. and he started working overtime immediately (10-12 hour days, 5-7 days per week). So again, back to doing things myself while pregnant.

In December, Graham signed up for the opportunity to work in San Diego in January. So, off he went for originally a four-week trip, which turned into almost six weeks of 12 hour nights, 6-7 nights per week. I think he had one or two days off during the six weeks?? While the money was a big blessing, again, I had to be on my own. Luckily we were able to schedule our anatomy scan the day before he left so Graham could be there when we found out we were having a girl--oh yeah, we're having a baby girl! January was rough because I was not prepared at all. I had no freezer meals, so Carter and I dined out a lot more than normal. Carter: "You mean we're going out to eat on a Wednesday??"

Not to mention in December, we went through a rough patch because Graham got off schedule due to his crazy work hours, and stopped taking his anxiety pills for several days, leading to a panic attack, irrational behavior, and withdrawal from meds. So scary and heartbreaking. It made me a little paranoid and crazy for a while after things got back on track. This happening during pregnancy only made things worse because of my hormones. I mean seriously, I'm not moody.. I'm just a little LOT more anxious while pregnant. Hearing what other pregnant women have gone through, though, has helped me a lot to know I'm not the only one. I've cried because I thought I was going to have go on meds. One good thing that has happened through all this time is that Graham and I have paid off all of our consumer debt in January (except for our cars--oh yeah, my XTerra died in February and we had to buy a new car AFTER putting $1100 of repairs into the XTerra--UGGHGHHGHGH).

On to February.. Graham went back to 12 hour days.. then was notified that starting at the end of the month, he'd be on graveyard shift for 120 days.. basically, until the baby is born. So, 9 PM to 5:30 AM wouldn't have been so bad, as we'd see him in the morning before work, see him for dinner and bedtime.. But now, he's one of the most senior employees in his shift, and he'll be working 12-hour nights (5:30 PM to 6 AM), 6-7 days a week for the next six weeks until baby arrives (due date May 30th). We see him for about 45 minutes per day. It sucks so much. Carter is a total daddy's boy, so he's super clingy with Graham whenever he sees him. Luckily, Graham is a great father and husband, so he helps around the house and has put together the nursery when Carter and I have been out of the house.

Oh, and Carter and I got rear-ended on the last day of March! Our car has been in the shop for over two weeks now, we had to get a new carseat, and I've been seeing a chiropractor that specializes in pregnancy adjustments. Again, luckily, we weren't seriously hurt, but it's been a massive inconvenience and source of stress. Then, this last week, I had a massive headache, and my blood pressure went up significantly. I'm not a hypochondriac, and I hate getting checked out when there's nothing wrong with me, but my doctor's office told me to go into Labor & Delivery to be checked out. So, I left work early, went into L&D, woke Graham up after only two hours of sleep, and got hooked up to blood pressure monitors to rule out pre-eclampsia. NOPE--nothing wrong. No protein in my urine, and my blood pressure wasn't even mildly elevated while lying down. So, the doctor there prescribed a couple days of rest from work.. And here I am today--with normal blood pressure but still feeling like crap. Pregnancy insomnia is the WORST.

So yeah, this is a total whiny post. Yes, there are unemployed people out there, or people who are salaried and don't get paid for overtime, so I shouldn't complain.. except I'm pregnant. And basically, I've been going through it alone. Props to single moms and women out there. I'm not cut out for this. There is light at the end of the tunnel--maternity leave. It's not a vacation, but hey.. I'll take it. 12 weeks of it. Ah yeah.

My Bad

Ok guys, so I found this blog about a woman who vowed to use her crockpot 365 days in a row. Check it out: http://crockpot365.blogspot.com/

I'm a fan.

BUT, I decided to try something new from this website.. and kind of expensive. We don't eat fish in this house. I'm very picky--the fish absolutely CANNOT smell like fish. It should be very neutral and inoffensive. So, I bought some frozen fish and shrimp for a fish chowder recipe. Graham was excited to try it, so I was like, ok this better be worth the big bucks I just put down on the fish and shrimp.

I had to work yesterday, so Graham had to put it all together in the crockpot. He accidentally sliced his finger open (we have very sharp knives) cubing the frozen fish. So, he had really invested his effort--his blood AND tears--in this soup too.

When I got home at 6 last night, the house REEKED of fish. Not good fish. Stinky fish. Stinky stinky stinky fish. I could barely kiss Graham because he smelled like the stinky fish.

When I looked at the soup, it looked pretty gross. The potatoes were brown, I don't know how, the soup looked oily and separated, and the shrimp were chewy. It smelled SO BAD, we both only took a bite, and tossed the rest down the drain. We ended up eating PB&J's and an old batch of beef and barley soup I'd frozen a month before... which tasted about 10 times better than the fish chowder.

Lesson learned: Don't spend a large amount of money on food you're not sure you're going to like.

I'm deodorizing the house today because I couldn't sleep with the fish smell. It kept waking me up.

Confession

I'm kind of a disaster in the kitchen.

Yes, I can cook, but I'm pretty clumsy and something will go wrong almost definitely if it can.

I spill things, knock things over, drop food on the floor, accidentally mix in the wrong ingredients.. i.e. anything that can do wrong... will go wrong!

Case #1: Burned Williams-Sonoma towel

Lesson learned: Don't use a towel to pick up a hot pan from an electric stove.

Case #2: Flaming marshmallow topping

Lesson learned:

Don't put marshmallows close to the broiler unless you want the fire alarm to go off.

Lesson of the day:

You know you are addicted to blogging when something is on fire in your kitchen and you stop and ask, "wait, can I take a picture of this for my blog?"

Tale of two cans

Let me tell you this story that illustrates our lives:

Graham's paycheck came late earlier this month, leaving us with a zero balance.. and no way for Graham to pay the toll on the Tacoma Narrows Bridge to pick me up at the Seattle/Tacoma Airport.

So he gathered up about $2.25 in change around the house.. And had this brilliant idea to go recycle a large bag of cans we'd been saving over the past month or so to get the extra cash to pay the toll. (Mind you, the toll was only $4. Yes, we were that poor.)

Graham drove all over Brem Brem, circled the grocery stores for recycling centers, and asked customer service centers at all of them if they recycle there. After many blank stares and vague directions, Graham finally received a clear answer: cans could be recycled at the recycling center which just so happened to be closed for the night... but it would only be for FREE. Washington doesn't reimburse people for recycling, which is why you don't see homeless people in Seattle collecting cans in shopping carts.

You see, in Portland, you get 5 cents per can.. Meaning Graham would've gotten enough money to pay the bridge toll, pick me up on time, etc..

Instead, Graham had to take the long way to avoid the bridge---60 miles down to Olympia, then 60 miles up to the airport--when it only would've been 60 miles straight to the airport... received a speeding ticket along the way and picked me up 30 minutes late for my flight that arrived at 1:15 AM.

So anyways, we ended up saving these troublesome cans because we were too lazy to get rid of them. When we were packing to go to Portland for the weekend, I had the brilliant idea to take the cans with us for a big profit--i.e. we had not paid the redemptive value at purchase and we would make a profit over the original soda purchase.

After Graham's cousin's farewell on Sunday, we stopped at Fred Meyer, the Northwest's Super Target/Wal-Mart, to recycle our cans and collect our cash.

Something went awry and over half of the cans were not processed by the recycler... and we wasted a half hour trying to force these recalcitrant cans through the recycler. The trouble makers were then tossed into the trash angrily.. although I considered giving them to an unsuspecting homeless person.

With our pitiful net of $1.90, we bought ourselves a 1 Liter Dr. Pepper for the drive home and called it a day.

I don't know if Graham will ever recycle again.

Just our luck..

Graham and I consistently have bad luck wherever we go. Ok, so I can't really claim that I've had bad luck only since I met Graham, but my luck has suspiciously gotten worse over the past year.. Graham says it's his life..

Anyways, so we had a trip to Disneyland last weekend, and our flight was on Thursday afternoon. Graham came home and took a shower quickly after work, and his brother drove us to the airport. We were cutting it close--3:40 for a 4:25 flight--but Graham couldn't have come home from work any earlier. So, Alaska Airlines only lets you check in luggage 40 minutes before flights, so in order for us to get down to Orange County, we had to wait 3 hours for the next flight at 7:15. We reluctantly agreed--Graham was very calm about it. I was extremely pissed. I hate being delayed. To make it even worse, my mom yelled at me for "missing" the flight. Then, I kindly reminded her she put my married name, not my maiden name (which I hadn't changed yet), so there.

Then, I noticed the airline ticket said my married name. I have not changed my name yet, and we had just gotten our marriage license a few days before. We decided not to take a chance with security and had Graham's grandpa pick us up at the airport to run home and get the license. So, all was going good.. until we went through security, bought some marionberry jam for Joanna, and noticed that our flight was delayed until 7:45. Freaking pissed again (and not about to eat a sick airport hotdog), we decided to leave the "Secured" area of the Portland airport and eat in the food court. All was good again.. until we went through security again.

"What's this?!"
"Um ma'am.. that's some jelly I just bought from the airport store."
"Well it's bigger than 3 oz, so we can't let it through."
"Are you serious? I just bought it here. It still has the tag on it."
"We can't let it in unless you have the receipt."

So yeah, I threw the receipt away. I walked away from security freaking mad--I JUST bought the jam!! Then, Graham suggests we go get a copy of the receipt from the store. The cashier finds it and escorts us back to the security checkpoint. Get this--the people who had just helped us went on a break, leaving the jam nowhere to be found.. Graham maintains that they were now spreading the delicious jam on bread for PB&J's.

Anyways, we had a wonderful weekend in SoCal at Disneyland and in Hollywood, Santa Monica, and Venice Beach. Even though the weather is nice, I just don't think I want to live down there.. The culture and the people are just... different. I also think I'd have to lose about 50 pounds to not be self-conscious about my body. Then, I'd have to get a boob job, and so on.. Soooo.. no thanks to living in SoCal.

A nice ending for our trip was a delayed flight back home to Portland.. getting us home around midnight. We both had to work extra early Monday morning, so we just LOVE Alaska Airlines! Oh, and I left a lemon in the cupboard for too long and it got all moldy and made our apartment smell. Plus, Graham and I both got colds from somebody. Sweet.